The strength from within…

13 02 2013

I met her almost a year and a half  ago. She came in like a blazing star and left the same way.  Her first MOPS meeting and she was so excited to be with other moms, instead of  being alone and feeling so isolated. I remember how that felt in our 2nd deployment.  The military can do that to you, especially when you live off post from an installation. It is hard to get up the desire and gumption sometimes to make a new friend. We move so often, the heart-strings hurt.. and we sometimes tend to allow the isolation get the better of us. But this is not about being isolated at all. This is about watching the Spirit of Heavenly Father work in one of His children, whether they knew it or not! Have you ever met someone who you just knew had a story? Well I remember when I first met her. I felt it in every ounce of my being. I could see the depression and the PTSD.  I have that gift;the gift of discernment. At times, I wish I did not. At times, I wish I could just make it go away. This time though it was for a very specific reason. It was to give me hope.

We all have a story. We all have a journey to participate in and a list of things we need to accomplish. We are given no template or no instructions at all. That is why we live in this plane; this is why it so hard because we have a choice on how to proceed in every aspect of our life. It is hard. It is supposed to be. In order to come to Him, it needs to be with our heart open. In The Simple Faith of Mr. Rogers, Amy Hollingsworth asks a very pointed question, “You know how you find somebody who you know is in touch with the truth, how you want to be in the presence of that person all of the time?” well this is the type of person I am talking about. This is my friend.

Regretfully, I did not heed Heavenly Fathers suggestion. I did not befriend her. I was in a very bad place myself and I was afraid I would not be able to help her. But, Heavenly Father always has a back up plan. She met a mutual friend of ours and the last year and half has been amazing!

I am a hard sell on a long-term friendship. Just look at those friends that have come and gone and you would be amazed at the length of that list. Admittedly, I have high expectation for my long-term friendships. I require a level of honesty that many people are just not comfortable with. I want my friends to look at me and say, ” Michele, I love you but……”. If they can’t do that, then I waste no time. Some of my short-term friends come out of listening to Him. He tells me what I need to do, in regards  to that friendship. But this young lady was different. I felt a long-lasting friendship and I was not ready yet. The fear of letting her down weighed on my heart so much. I knew she needed a good friend, I knew she needed Love and Hope in her life and I felt hopeless myself. How do you help someone when your cup is  all ready so empty? I felt vulnerable as well. My hubby and I were not doing well and I was in  graduate school. It  took so much of my time, I used excuses. Sad isn’t it?

So fast forward to the last month. I was taking my kids on a trip to Disney. Jeff being on his 4th deployment, I really did not want to take 3 kids alone. So what do I do? I get the bright idea to ask someone to go…I decide to ask my Facebook  friends. She replied. Nervousness set in. What if I let her down? What if she does not like me? Heavenly Father what if a say something and I make a mistake. But I ignored those fears. He gave me comfort and told me this would be good. So we made arrangements to go together; her two and my three. So here is the visual I need you to see: a mini van with a car top, one cranky middle-aged woman, one young full of energy new mommy, a 3 month old, an 18 month old a, 3.5 year old, an 8-year-old and a 10-year-old.. all driving to the happiest place on earth. Crazy! Little did I know!

It was not crazy though. Like myself, she is former military and married to a military man. Like myself, she is pretty easy-going. Most importantly , like myself she is human too! We farted, we burped, we cursed,  we laughed, we cried, we loved on our children, we met the princesses, we rode many roller-coasters and had a WONDERFUL time. We came home totally exhausted but we made it!

These were all byproducts of the week. The week was really about witnessing a change in my friend, who I now consider a sister. I saw a much stronger woman that week. One who took care of her children despite the anger hurt and resentment she kept deeply buried. I witness her hope for the first time since she came home from Iraq. I witnessed a transformation that humbled me wholeheartedly. I saw Hope radiate from every ounce of her body, mind and spirit! She tore off most of the shackles of a few war related experiences this past year; somethings no woman should ever experience no matter what side you are fighting for..  Hearing her say,” I felt special.” sent me over the falls in tears several nights after.  It still makes me shiver when I think of our time together. How wonderful and blessed I was to see the result of her hard work in therapy and with Heavenly Father.

It is possible to overcome any obstacle before us. She reminded me of that.  It takes time.  It take patience. It also takes work. Work in our relationships with Heavenly Father and with a few good friends.  I wish I had someone like her as my mother. Her two children are so very blessed to have such strong Godly woman being groomed for His glory! Her story inspired me. It showed me how Hope, Faith and Love are really all we need to make it here. Yes, the kids and I really needed this trip. But the purpose was not what I originally thought. It was to  remind me how blessed I am and how important it is for us to share our story. When we are relationships with others, we see His love. We see His grace and can really count the blessings we have to be grateful for. Thank you my friend. Thank you for sharing your story and your time with me.

I love you.

M

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4 responses

13 02 2013
Ruthie

So very well written! Thank you! This was a wonderful time and I totally miss being with you! Thank you! I am so happy we bonded over just that week! We are forever family no matter where we end up! I love you!!!!

13 02 2013
Ramblings of a military spouse....

Whenever you need someone..call…I am only a drive away!

13 02 2013
Carole Kloss

This is beautiful. I believe we are all here for someone and she was your someone. I have friends we met during our years in the Army, some were friends but there are special ones who are family. We still keep in contact with 2 couples we have not seen in forty years. We went to visit another couple we found after 35 years, when she walked out the door, it was like we only saw each other the day before, her and Idecided we were sisters of the heart. We military folks are a special kind of family.

13 02 2013
Ramblings of a military spouse....

Carole,
Thanks for commenting and taking the time to read. I have a few friends like that too. We are a special breed and some of them I will never forget!

Every comment is appreciated....

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